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Almost every divorce starts out with
parties having very different views. We help divorcing and separating
clients resolve disputes so they can move
forward.
We can help you reach agreements in your divorce and separation in a
respectful and cost-effective manner,
where you and your spouse make the decisions about your future
and your children's future.
You can probably make better decisions for yourself and
your children than any stranger could. Why not make
those decisions yourself based on the factors that are important to you? Yet, reaching common ground
that meets the needs of all can be challenging without
professional facilitation, guidance, assistance, and education. Our
focus is to help by providing highly qualified facilitation,
guidance, and assistance to help you to reach consensus in
your divorce so you can move forward in your life.
When
you and your spouse reach resolutions that best suit
your values, goals, and needs,
the resolutions are not just better but also tend to be more durable. We
help people like you reach divorce resolutions by listening
carefully and helping them identify what is most important to them. We then help
our clients create a reality-based divorce settlement that is in
alignment with their own priorities, goals, and needs. The Collaborative Divorce process
and facilitative divorce mediation are the only processes
that are specifically designed to consistently help
clients reach that level of divorce resolution. When the needs of divorced parents
and children are addressed in
a manner that is respectful and preserves everyone's dignity, they are usually also better able to co-parent
their children together.
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Realities of Old-Style Divorce
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Hiring divorce lawyers for a
conventional old-style divorce, which may involve the court
(or arbitrator) to
various degrees, is an option that might be most appropriate for you. It also has disadvantages. Here are some realities about
that option:
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The court is far from ideal for the task of
restructuring your family after a divorce. Most judges
and divorce lawyers lack training in family
systems or child development
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In a court divorce, a judge makes life-altering
decisions for you ... and may get it
wrong. The judge does not have to live with the
mistakes.
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Court divorce proceedings are usually
extremely expensive (more than you would likely
imagine), and the legal fees are often
significantly underestimated.
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A court divorce inevitably exacts an
emotional toll for all involved.
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In a court divorce, intimate details of your finances
and other matters become a public record, often
permanently available to anyone.
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Court fights cannot help divorcing spouses co-parent
after the attempt to "win" is over. Nor
can they make you feel better in the long-run.
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The legal maneuverings and positioning that
precede the settlement can easily cause
unnecessary pain and resentment, contributing to
future problems and even a seemingly endless
series of legal battles.
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The court requires that
significant attention be paid to procedural
details, legal technicalities, and arbitrary
timelines, all of which take time, cost money, and
can interfere with solving
problems.
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No one really wins either in a court divorce,
or by the use of the power tactics that are
commonly used to reach conventional settlements.
The court is structured as an adversarial system,
where the "truth" is supposedly in-between two
extremes. The court makes decisions based on
arguments made by divorce lawyers, who generally
argue to "win" something that cannot be winnable.
What to expect in your divorce? Read more
about divorce and family law.
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Instead of the old-style way of having a stranger make
what may be some of the most important decisions in your
life, divorcing and separating couples have the option
of making their own divorce decisions.
There are many alternatives and you can choose the one that fits you. When
supported by divorce lawyers and other professionals who
are trained in non-court methods of arriving at divorce
settlements, couples can often get a divorce that
better preserves relationships, dignity, and
privacy.
By resolving the conflict and addressing some of the
pain that is inherent in divorce, each
spouse can move forward with his or her life.
This can be done through
the Collaborative Divorce
process
and divorce mediation with the assistance of divorce lawyers
and professionals who focus exclusively on helping couples in conflict come to agreement. We
do not view our lawyer's job as going to court to try to
“win” a divorce, because all too often even the “winner”
loses -- along with everyone else.
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Educating Yourself About Divorce |
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1. Explore this site to learn as much as you
can about divorce, available divorce process options, and working
with divorce lawyers. Learn about
all Divorce Options
available to you, so you can make the best choice
for yourself.
2. Call to make an appointment for a consultation,
so you can:
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Explore what may be most important for you in
your post-divorce future.
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Understand the different divorce options and
evaluate which one(s) may be best for your unique
situation.
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Identify the factors that will help you
determine whether a Collaborative Divorce,
divorce mediation, or another divorce process is
best for your unique circumstances.
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Plan what's next based on what is
most suitable for you.
3. Learn about
Selecting Divorce
Lawyers.
How to schedule an appointment?
Read More
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Collaborative
Law and mediation in divorce are especially well suited for protecting privacy.
Instead of placing personal information in a public
court record,
negotiations in Collaborative Divorce and divorce mediation are
private and confidential. Unlike a court decision, many
of the details of your divorce settlement may even remain confidential
by placing them in a contract that can stay private. In
the
Collaborative Law divorce process, everyone signs an agreement at the start that
the divorce discussions and proceedings will remain confidential
and that the lawyers' only role can be to focus on
settlement. No other divorce process offers that degree of privacy protection that applies to all
professionals as an inherent part of the structure from the beginning to end.
Similarly, in divorce mediation, everyone signs
an agreement that the divorce negotiations will remain
confidential.
By
helping divorcing parents preserve a working
relationship, Collaborative Divorce allows parents to reach
better solutions for their children and to build a new
and better
co-parenting relationship for their future. In our
experience, parents rarely work better
together after a child custody or visitation fight in court,
and the children are often victims of a court battle in
their parents' divorce. We all know that children learn from
their parents, including lessons drawn from how they
observe their
parents handling their divorce or separation.
Collaborative Divorce is family-focused divorce, and
allows the opportunity for parents to work together to
build a healthy and cooperative parenting partnership
and to model for their
children how to best resolve conflict.
Most divorce lawyers and judges will tell you
that courts are far from ideal for the task of
restructuring families. In divorce court, intimate details of a couple's finances and
other matters are presented to a judge or court
commissioner who makes
life-altering decisions
based on the law as guided by arguments made by the divorce lawyers and a
limited amount of evidence that lawyers may present
under court rules and laws.
Even when the divorce laws provides clear guidance
(often the law does not), the law may not be a good fit
for your
family's unique circumstances. Divorce court proceedings
are often very expensive, the outcome is often uncertain and
unpredictable, and the emotional toll can be great. Often, no one wins.
A court fight (even on a motion for a temporary
parenting plan (custody and visitation), alimony/spousal
maintenance or child support) usually does not make
divorcing spouses better able to co-parent after the
court fight is over. Even when there is a
divorce settlement after bartering-style negotiations, the legal maneuverings
and positioning that preceded
the settlement can often cause unnecessary pain and
resentment and contribute to future problems. While the
court provides a necessary service when needed, it is
best to avoid court involvement in your divorce if
possible.
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Tens of thousands of divorcing couples have found that
the Collaborative Divorce process can result in a better quality outcome
with less stress and greater control than going to court
and where the divorce lawyers are not creating more problems. Collaborative
Divorce can help couples
reach agreements through dialogue with full legal support
from trained attorneys that helps preserve relationships. With skilled support,
divorcing couples are usually able to reach their own resolutions
that are right for them. The divorcing couple's
agreements are placed into legally binding divorce
settlement documents. Divorce mediation is another
effective process
where a neutral mediator assists the divorcing couple
reach agreements, and where the parties often also have
attorneys to advise them.
Additional information about Collaborative
Law, mediation, and divorce is on the
Family Law and Divorce Options
and
Collaborative Divorce
sections of this site.
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Benefits of a Collaborative Divorce |
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You retain the important decisions
about your life for yourself ... instead of
turning over those decisions to the divorce
lawyers and the court.
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You have the assistance of divorce lawyers whose sole focus
and effort is to help you reach resolution.
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You may arrive at agreed solutions that
might be unavailable through the court.
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You have support from other
divorce professionals as
may be appropriate, including
neutral financial specialists, child
specialists, and divorce coaches, all working
together in coordination.
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You can preserve your post-divorce relationships
while working through difficult issues.
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You and your spouse work jointly to find
solutions to problems within a process structure and
with the support of a coordinated professional team to help
you stay on track.
Collaborative Divorce is not for everyone, so make the right choice for you.
Read more about Collaborative Divorce.
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Collaborative Divorce and divorce mediation are both highly effective
processes that have helped many couples successfully
resolve their disagreements to reach a divorce
settlement. Collaborative Divorce is well-suited for complex divorces
with conflict, including cases involving complicated property and
business issues, special needs children, and unique
parenting issues where preserving post-divorce
relationships is critical. As a conflict resolution
process, Collaborative Divorce may be appropriate even when the conflict is significant. While Collaborative Divorce
or divorce mediation can work well for many divorcing
couples, no process can be right
for everyone and it is important that you make the
choice that is right for you. We encourage you to
explore this site, and to learn as much as you can to
make the right choice for you. We can assist you in evaluating your
options, so you can find
the divorce process that is best suited for your unique
situation. Part of our job is to help
you identify the factors so you can decide for yourself whether Collaborative
Divorce, divorce mediation, or another divorce process is
best for your unique circumstances and your values.
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Divorce Mediation |
Divorce mediation is an effective process
where a trained impartial mediator assists you and
your spouse reach agreements for your divorce.
Divorce lawyers are normally not in the room with
the parties during a mediation. However, parties often have divorce lawyers to advise them
and write up the final documents in a mediation process.
Read more about Divorce Mediation. |
J. Mark Weiss is a Seattle family law attorney who
is highly experienced in
litigation and conventional practice, but whose sole focus is now on settlement
and resolution of
divorce and family law matters.
His experience, skill, and advanced training allows him
to provide these services on a cost-effective basis.
In addition to
his Collaborative Divorce and facilitative
divorce mediation, Mark also provides consultation services,
both to other divorce lawyers and directly
to separating and divorcing spouses who may wish a fresh
perspective. His services include
providing additional opinions, advice on divorce negotiation,
and help getting a stuck case back on track.
Mark has successfully and confidentially consulted with
other Collaborative divorce teams and mediators to help
them successfully complete difficult cases.
Rated among the 25-best family law attorneys in Washington State by Washington Law and Politics magazine,
lawyer
J. Mark Weiss has for the last 24+ years helped couples divorce.
Mark has extensive
divorce litigation, mediation, negotiation and Collaborative Divorce experience.
Mark received the
“Attorney of the Year” award from the Washington State
Bar Association Family Law Section, was named a
Fellow of the American Academy of Matrimonial
Lawyers, and
has
continuously been on the “Super Lawyers” list of
Washington Law and Politics
Magazine since 2007. Having retired from divorce litigation
and conventional representation after more than two decades inside
and outside the
courtroom, he is now
entirely focused on family law dispute resolution.
He also trains other attorneys, financial specialists,
mental health professionals, and others in the Collaborative Divorce
process and dispute resolution methods. For
more background information, click the “About Us” tab
above.
Besides divorce (dissolution of marriage), divorce
lawyer J. Mark Weiss also works
with couples in other family law matters, including legal
separations, parentage/paternity, domestic partnership
and GLBT dissolution,
unmarried couple, and modification of child support and
parenting (custody and visitation) matters. We also
provide second opinions and assist other attorneys to
get difficult cases back on track. We are conveniently
located in Seattle, and serve the greater King County
area.
From our convenient Seattle location, we serve clients
from throughout King County and beyond, including Bellevue, Kirkland, Mercer
Island, Redmond, Everett and surrounding areas. Mark
provides guidance, insight, skill, and support to help
guide you through your divorce or separation, or other
family law matter.

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